A woman recounts her experience as a domestic violence victim at the hands of an alcoholic husband, fighting a system that refused to register an FIR

Champawat, Uttarakhand: Dressed in a ripe pink lehenga, the bejewelled bride looked anxious on her wedding day on May 18, 2013. Glancing at her wedding picture, Jyoti* says she was a naive bride with no idea of what was coming ahead. She was just 18.

The wedding venue was her childhood home at Patan Gaon in Lohaghat tehsil of Chamapawat district in Uttarakhand. Her parents’ savings and loans paid for the wedding arrangements. Her mother sold dairy products and earned from their farm and livestock, while her father worked as a driver in the city.  

Just a few days before her wedding, Jyoti found out that her to-be-husband would take to alcohol. They ran into an argument and she wished to not have any association with him. She was worried since he stopped taking her calls up to the wedding. 

However, she could not articulate herself. She felt a sense of compulsion to agree to the wedding on the pretext of her future being secured, paving the way for two younger siblings. Her in-laws promised that she could continue her education and would not object in case of employment. It felt like the right thing to do. However, for the time being, she discontinued her bachelor’s degree course after the first year. 

"His sister was my classmate in the first year of college. She thought I was a good match for him. She told this to her parents, and my family soon got a proposal from them."

Jyoti regrets giving away a cheque worth Rs 25,000 she received on completion of class 12 to her in-laws, as kanya dhan.  

Soon after marriage, she realised that the atmosphere at home was negative. She was no longer going to college, instead was coping to be a daughter-in-law in her new household. It was a household with rules that revolved around monetary benefits. The cooking gas would be lit only once a day to prepare all the meals, in order to save gas. Her sisters-in-law expected her to clean up after them and ordered her around. 

It was within the first six months that her husband asked her to leave her in-law's home. Differences with her husband only grew from here on, but she continued to live with him in the hope of saving her marriage.

“It was so absurd that we tried to move to another town for a better income for him and I was made to give up my mangalsutra for financial aid, despite him coming from a family of landowners. I realised he had debts everywhere we went.” 

Over time, the emotional abuse and lack of monetary support grew unreasonably. “Our fights were aggressive and I remember an instance when I took the bus to a nearby town [Haldwani] to a relative's house in search of work and a life on my own terms. However, my husband threatened my parents and made me return home.”

It so happened around then that Vandana Asha, now founder and CEO of Rang Karwaan, knocked on Jyoti’s door as part of her research and development activity to understand the beat of the town. Rang Karwaan is a learning centre that uses art as its core to help women, children and youth in Champawat. In her subsequent interactions with Jyoti, Asha realised that her marriage was in trouble. 

Asha encouraged Jyoti to lodge a police complaint. However, their complaint was not registered at Champawat Police Station, citing lack of serious injuries or proof of violence.

“They lacked empathy and turned us away,” said Asha. “But on our way out, we spotted the women’s cell and approached a policewoman sitting there. Her approach was in contrast to the authorities at the police station. She was aggressive and urged Jyoti to file for divorce.” No complaint was registered at the cell.  

Her husband’s presence tormented her and she wanted to leave the marriage immediately. Meanwhile, she began to work part-time at Rang Karwaan. 

Seeking justice and building independence

Having worked with sexual abuse and harassment victims and Bihar Police, Asha suggested that they should visit the One Stop Centre (OSC) in Champawat. Set up by the Ministry of Women and Child Development, OSCs provide integrated support and assistance to women affected by violence, both in private and public spaces, under one roof. It also facilitates immediate, emergency and non-emergency access to a range of services, including medical, legal, psychological and counselling support. 

“When we reached OSC, it was shut. People in the area passed on the contact details of the centre incharge, who is also an advocate. On learning that OSC was functioning from the District Programme Office at that time, we went there to meet advocate Ritu Singh, who heard Jyoti out,” Asha says. 

Singh enabled her to file for divorce. However, after repeated court hearings and the continuous absence of her husband, it was concluded as a one-sided divorce through an ex-parte order where the partner's decision-making is inconsequential. 

As per Jyoti and the advocate, her husband turned out only once for the court hearings, during which Jyoti’s decision to separate from him was made clear. Singh recounts that he was aggressive and non-cooperative. 

Jyoti lived apart from her husband briefly when she along with Asha went to the nearest police station in Champawat to lodge a formal complaint. She then took her time and figured that she would want to file for divorce once and for all. Her husband was not aware since no FIR (the police turned down her request) was registered against him.  

Singh also took the domestic violence case to the family court in July-August of 2023. "Once the domestic incident report was put together with all the details, the case was taken to the family court," Singh details.

While the divorce came through months later in February this year, having filed for it in November-December of 2023, the case of domestic violence is still in court due to her now ex-husband's continued absence during court hearings. "The domestic violence case will help me get my belongings back and compensation for the money spent during my wedding,” Jyoti says.

"This case has been ongoing since August, almost a year and a half ago. If he continues to skip court hearings, he will receive a court order directing him to provide compensation and to send Jyoti’s belongings [clothes, jewellery etc] to her," informs Singh, who has been serving as an advocate at OSC since 2019. She was earlier with the Uttarakhand High Court and the Haldwani District Court.

Jyoti says she has been doing the rounds of courts for almost a year now. She does not know how many times she visited the court so far, but is sure to have gone there once or twice every month. It took away half a day of work or sometimes up to a whole day.

So far, she has been able to pay only half the fees for her lawyer in the divorce case. She has been taking loans from friends and relatives to manage expenses related to legal procedures.

"Under the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005, there are no stringent punishments unless it is an extreme case of criminal offence where the wife has been beaten to death or burnt alive. The husband’s property can be seized under Section 125 of the Code of Criminal Procedure, if he refuses to provide maintenance."

According to Singh, most of the cases that reach OSC deal with domestic violence, with alcoholism and unemployment being the reasons leading to it. "We may get up to 12 cases in a month. Matters like inability to conceive or the woman’s complexion are common causes of aggression and violence."

"We want to have the power to facilitate police investigations against the accused or carry out more impactful counselling at our centre where the opposite party listens to us and takes us seriously,” Singh said, while explaining how OSCs can function more efficiently. Further, OSC does not have a vehicle to get to the victim's home in time, in case a woman is injured or has a medical emergency. 

"As an ally, it is crucial that we understand all the nuances while accompanying the victim. We should do homework on laws and policies, so that the authorities do not take us for a ride. Also, extreme sensitivity, empathy and continued support are necessary." 

Jyoti awaits her closure in the domestic violence case. She makes a living through Rang Karwaan and by pursuing tailoring work. After navigating eight daunting years of marriage, she has completed her undergraduate studies at a private institution and lives an independent life.

As of January 2025, Jyoti is now looking to close the case due to the delay in justice, the lack of cooperation, and any financial aid from her former husband. She fears a threat to her family if the case proceeds since her brother-in-law has threatened her safety in the past. She now wants nothing to do with the case and her former husband. 

*Name changed to protect privacy

This story was originally published as part of the Crime and Punishment project in collaboration with Vidhi Centre for Legal Policy. Cover photo - Representative image/ AI-generated using Canva